AP302026

 


MEMENTO MORI

All hopes are up to finish a shift that’s quite tiresome, but you don’t back down because you have something in mind. You still have to reply to a message you received about a reservation confirmation for Monday next week. You play it safe, careful not to make it too obvious it’s supposed to be a surprise. For the first time, you are genuinely excited about a plan. You know this could be the start of a big change.

The Call

Not until someone calls you from your Zoom app.

The application is connected to your phone, so as it rings from your computer, it also notifies your phone. Hoping not to miss a single thing, she checks it only to find a missed interview from yesterday.

All hell breaks loose.

The Breaking Point

That’s the start of a nightmare.

When she thought you had been nothing but complacent and contented, you had actually been trying to win every interview, from what she knows. That’s the beginning of your final.

You can’t help but look at the door, the same door she once opened for you, the one you entered through to become part of her life. And now, you know that sooner or later, it will be the same door you’ll walk through again… this time to leave.

Flashback

A flashback comes rushing in.

There was a time when all you did was pray and hope for another chance to be with her again. And then she gave you that chance.

And now… everything is about to end.

Reality

Now it feels like a dream that pulls you back to reality when you find yourself alone in your own room.

You should feel happy.

But all you feel is regret, guilt, and pain.

Distraction

You try to escape it.

You go out with friends, hiking, yet you’re lost in your own thoughts. Later, during karaoke night, with warm beer in hand, everyone is laughing, singing, living in the moment.

But for you, every noise starts to fade.

You can’t hear anything… except her.

Her laugh.
Her voice.
Even your own voice echoes as if you’re being dragged back into a world you’ve already lost.

The Memory

You are pulled into a memory.

A special one.

A time when you were with her.

And suddenly, you’re living in that memory fully there while your body remains somewhere else, in a different dimension. You would rather stay lost in that made-up world, because in that place, she’s still laughing, still smiling, still calling your name… still needing your presence.

The Choice

You would rather not snap back to reality.

Because in this reality, no matter the distraction, no matter the laughter, the noise, the company, nothing replaces the feeling of being content while dreaming big… and turning those dreams into reality, one by one…

…while she was with you.

Now

And now… You don’t even know where to start.

How do you begin again?

You try to move on, to look forward to a new tomorrow, but how can you do that when your past is the only place you want to be? You can’t bear it… Yet you also can’t shake the thought of her being with someone else. Of her kids knowing someone else as tatay…

You don’t want to hurt her anymore. You don’t even know where to stand with that thought, while your mind, your body, and your soul are all screaming at you to fight for her.

You are completely lost.

Your eyes grow heavy from dried up tears that never seem to stop, no matter how much pain you’ve already carried. And deep down, you know… there’s nothing to go back to. She’s not coming back for her own peace of mind.

But you keep lying to yourself.

Telling yourself that sooner or later, she’ll realize that you are someone worth fighting for.

You would rather hold on to that delusion… than face the reality that you were nothing more than another chapter in someone else’s story.

And sooner or later… she will continue that story with someone new

as the author.

The World You Choose

You would rather be lost and confused in an unstable world, struggling, breaking, trying so hard to fix things just to make it safe for her than to be safe and sound in a four-walled room all by yourself, surrounded by nothing but silence and darkness.

Because even chaos feels like home if it leads back to her.

And peace… without her…
feels like nothing at all.

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